RBD Break Up + Kids Cry + Protests = Gag Me With a Spoon

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Last Friday, the Mexican group RBD called it quits in a simple and unexpected press release with the excuse that "todo gran proyecto necesita transformarse para trascender." I was unaffected –and a bit happy– while some people I don’t know were sent on a frenzy over the "devastating" evento.

For me, the Spice Girls (played by Mayte, Anahí, Dulce María) meets Backstreet Boys (played by Alfonso, Cristian, Christopher) are done crowding us with their horrendous music. Sure, we may indulge in their hits en una noche de nacadas, but to have this pre-fabricated Televisa product cranking out one bad song after another for years to come is a horrible thought. Sorry, but not even Billy Méndez from Motel, who has penned songs for the cheeseballs, can help them out.

El colmo de los colmos is actually the public’s reaction to the break up. Kids in Mexico, maybe New York City and -God helps us– around the globe are planning a march this Saturday, August 23. And who gave the innocent pollitos this idea? None other than Anahí, la guera del grupete, who made a call to arms of sorts through a Univision forum.

Ajem, so let’s revise shall we? A bunch of telenovela actors-turned-singers rise to fame in a mere four years and decide to end it all out of nowhere. Then they go on various press outlets to beg fans to keep them around, then they cry at interviews saying they must say goodbye while they’re still on top. Are we trapped in their novela? or their enormous publicity scheme? I honestly was not going to give them the time of day, yes, it’s too ridiculous, and after a while, HILARIOUS.

Watch the following video in which dear Anahí sounds like she’s reading all her concerns from a script with the believable emotion of Thalía in Marimar, all while Cristian shamelessly plugs the farewell tour and new album.

Annoying marcha in Brazil (these kids will probably be embarrassed by this video when they turn ten years old)