Remezcla readers love to take in culture, but don’t always have the cash for tickets. That’s where we come in. A Theater Near You is Remezcla’s guide to awesome Latin movies for the lazy and broke; you can watch these all at home (because sabemos que son flojos).
This is pretty much what our Theater Near You column was invented for: you, stuck at home, with junk food and nothing to do. Hurricane Sandy is bringing to fruition everything we’ve been unconsciously been preparing for. A la orden.
Carlos: “When you make a biopic and the real-life subject sues you, you know you’re on to something. Especially when that guy is in jail for for life because he killed a couple of French secret agents.”
CRONOS: “Cronos, on the other hand, is a fucking mess. But make no mistake, it’s a mess we fully recommend you watch and love for what it shows us: the development of Guillermo del Toro’s distinct style.” (That’s just my opinion…)
Gigante: “With it’s subdued humor, melancholic pace, and minimalist dialogue Gigante is like the emo cousin of the Meg Ryan/Jennifer Aniston romantic comedies you are used to.”
La Mission: “I live in New York but I’m from the Bay. Yeah, I chose to move east, but much like an expat in exile I constantly complain about New York and long for my ‘home country.’ I miss the year-round sunshine, good Mexican food, and sometimes even the hippies. Watching La Mission is the perfect antidote.”
Univision Streams Awesome Old Movies for Free: “Thanks to Univision, we’ll be procrastinating for hours just watching these old movies. Some are better than others, but honestly it’s hard to do better than these titles”
Cowboy del Amor: “Also known as the cowboy cupid, Ivan runs a matchmaking business for lonely gringos looking to find a ‘mucho bonita’ Mexican wife.”
Plata Quemada: “In 1965, a ragtag group of criminals had flawlessly planned a heist of an armored car carrying tons of cash to a small town in Argentina. The escape route was set, the getaway driver heavily sedated to ensure he would stay calm, and all involved were heavily armed. But, of course, things didn’t go quite as planned.”
Sleep Dealer: “Sleep Dealer isn’t your run-of-the-mill Sci-Fi movie. It’s in Spanish, it’s political and it imagines the near future; a world of cyberbraceros, coyoteks, remotely-controlled drones, aqua-terrorists, and closed borders.”
Eduardo Noriega: “But, let’s forget about Noriega’s descent into crappy American movies and remember his better days. This week’s Theater Near You is a tribute to Eduardo Noriega and his best performances.”
Gael vs. Diego: “Diego Luna and Gael Garcia Bernal have been BFFs since they were niñitos. Famous for their co-starring breakout roles in Y Tu Mamá También they do everything together–not just acting. They created Ambulante, a documentary film festival that travels to different cities in Mexico, they launched a production company, Canana Films, and even had baby boys a few months apart. ¡No mames! But, even though they are tied at the cintura, they sometimes branch out and do their own stuff. They have acted in some chingón movies together, some just as chido movies apart, and others que no sirven para nada. So here is the good, the bad, and the ugly (ok, neither of them could ever be ugly).”
Alamar: “Set in a small house on stilts that sits above the crystal-clear blue waters of the Yucatan Peninsula, it explores the bond between a father and son as they share a fishing trip together.”
Sin Nombre: “Back in 2009, it played some theaters and made a decent amount of money for an indie film. It’s rare that a film in Spanish and about Latin America makes it to a theater, so it’s a pretty big deal when it happens. It’s a chance to show the world what we are all about.”
Risa en Vacaciones: “Risa en Vacaciones is a hilarious Mexican prank movie from the early nineties. A bunch of actors, only identified as Pedro, Pablo, Paco, Gaby, and Ana pull elaborate pranks on gringo tourists and unsuspecting Mexis vacationing in Acapulco, Cancún, Mexico City, and Cabo San Lucas. It’s kinda like candid camera but way more perverted. And just like Jackass, they couldn’t make just one movie, or even two, there are SEVEN sequels. Yeah, siete! And thanks to Univision the first three are readily available por internet.”
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