Today, the East Coast is staring down what is being reported as one of the worst snow storms in history, with a projected snowfall of up to three feet in parts of New England, and 18-24 inches for NYC. My heart goes out to all the people, myself included, who still haven’t taken out their AC window units. Aside from that, I’m kind of a big fan of apocalyptic snow storms because they make it socially acceptable for me to never leave my apartment and eat all of the snacks.
With that in mind, here are some recommendations for how to survive this year’s snowmageddon. Unless we all lose power & internet in which case life is cancelled, and there is no way we can help you.
1
Block All Your West Coast/Caribbean Friends on Social Media
We all have these friends:
As much as we may love them, our fragile psyches can’t handle this right now. I DON’T WANT TO SEE THIS. It’s a holiday in the Dominican Republic and if one more beach frolicking photo pops up in my timeline I will go postal. Block everyone necessary until weather conditions have improved.
2
Hit Up Your Dealer ASAP
You’re probably going to be stuck inside for a while, so if your stash is low this is not the time to procrastinate. The later in the day it gets, the less likely your special delivery is going to come through. Send. texts. now.
Side note: the day weed dealers decide to implement Uber’s surge pricing model we’re all in trouble.
3
Actually Buy Groceries
For those of you counting on Seamless to see you through these next couple of days, think again. De Blasio has announced that non-emergency vehicles driving after 11pm can be arrested, which means no late night delivery. And anyway, if you’re the kind of person who feels no guilt ordering delivery when it’s an arctic tundra outside then you’re probably a demon.
Take your ass to the grocery store, buy your weight in hot cheetos & takis, and you should be fine.
4
Get Your Netflix Queue Right
Check out our Netflixeando series for recommendations on the best Latin American and Latino films you can watch on Netflix while you’re holed up in your house:
Netflixeando: 10 Latino Films You Should Stream on Netflix
Netflixeando: 15 Mexican Films You Should Stream On Netflix
Netflixeando: 20 Latino Films on Netflix You Can Watch With the Fam
Netflixeando: 10 Spanish Horror Movies You Can Watch on Netflix Right Now
5
Get Busy
Blizzards are the raison d’être of Cuffing Season. If you played your cards right this fall, then you’ve scooped a bae to snuggle up with tonight. We recommend our sexy times playlist to set the mood.
6
Catch Up On the #LongReads You've Been Putting Off
If you didn’t play your cards right during Cuffing Season, then you can just use the alone time to catch up on all those Long Reads you bookmark and then forget to finish. A few we recommend:
Trilligan’s Island: A Raunchy, New Puerto Rican Rap Movement Wants To Take Over Hip-Hop En Español.
Haiti Meets D.F. With Fvded’s “Barreto”