Netflix’s first Spanish-language original series, Club de Cuervos, kicked off this weekend. The soccer-themed comedy follows a family fighting over their inheritance, a football club called Los Cuervos based in the fictional city of Nuevo Toledo. If you haven’t started watching Club de Cuervos yet, then you need to get on it. The 13-episode first season is filled with family drama, paternity suits, locker room pranks, shouting matches, dick jokes, and social media references, all while providing social commentary on Mexico’s current state of affairs, including corruption, homophobia, and class.
The mix of players that make up the starting lineup for Cuervos F.C. is perfectly curated to replicate the rosters of real-life, world-class club teams. There’s the highly-devoted hometown hero/team captain, a cut Argentine with a six-pack who looks like a male model, a Brazilian who speaks Portañol and no one understands, the rookie who asks other players for autographs, and the big international star they want to bring in but will probably bankrupt the team.
Just in time to get you binge-ready, here’s the official roster for Club de Cuervos.
Chava, Team Co-Owner
Played by Luis Gerardo Méndez. He’s rich, he’s incompetent, he does coke, and he takes selfies. In other words, comedy gold. For some reason (sexism), he is picked as the team’s new president after his father dies.
Isabel, Team Co-Owner
Played by Mariana Treviño. She’s the level-headed business savvy older sister, but the fact that she doesn’t have a “par de huevos” means she gets overlooked when it comes time to pick a new team president.
Félix, Team Manager
Played by Daniel Giménez Cacho. He’s the one who actually knows how to run a professional sports organization and is trying to keep it all together, while Chava almost brings them down.
Goyo, Head Coach
Played by Emilio Guerrero (left). He is supposed to coach the team, but Chava butts in and gives the players different positions, screwing up his lineups. Coaching ain’t easy.
Moisés, Team Captain
Played by Ianis Guerrero (right). He’s the hometown hero who’s caught between being loyal to his religious wife and partaking in his teammates’ post-game celebratory lady-killing.
Played by Antonio de la Vega. He’s the elder statesman of the team and he’s about to retire, but he’ll always be close to the drama. Isabel, the team’s co-owner, happens to be his wife. Chava, the one calling the shots, is his brother-in-law.
Potro, the Beefcake
Played by Joaquin Ferreira (right). Naturally, he spends most of the season with his shirt off and talking about his off-the-field conquests.
Cuau, the Voice of Reason
Played by Said Sandoval (center). He’s the voice of reason on the pitch and the owner of the prerequisite ridiculous futbolero haircut.
Aitor, the International Star
Played by Alosian Vivancos (right). He’s the guy they want to bring in when things aren’t going well. Since he’s at the prime of his career, his salary is way beyond the team’s budget and he’s got a diva complex. None of these things bode well for Los Cuervos.
Tony, the Rookie
Played by Juan Pablo de Santiago. He’s so green, he even asks other players for their autographs. It’s pretty adorable. His teammates are less sympathetic and play all sorts of pranks on him.
Rio, the Brazilian
Played by Gutemberg Brito (left). He speaks Portuguese and no one ever knows what he is saying.