A piropo, in case you don’t know, is a flirtatious, often poetic (though it might be a broad definition of poetry) saying or rhyme shared – often muttered in passing or shouted from across the street, but whatever – with the object of your admiration. They’re supposed to be clever and disarming, but too often they’re kind of cheesy and uncomfortable, if not outright gross. For example, my favorite one has always been….
¡Bendito sea el árbol de donde sacaron la madera para hacer la cuna sobre la que te mecieron!
…because holy crap is that way too complicated and poetic and weird. I’m pretty sure I first read that in a text book. Anyway, we asked our Remezclanistas on Facebook to share with us their favorites, and these are the results. Our readers are perverts!
Traes tupperware? Porque te voy a dar hasta para llevar.
Has that ever worked for anyone?
Me dejas como brazo de albañil: duro y venoso
Gross.
Many men don’t like to acknowledge that women fart. Antonio Frias is clearly not one of those men.
Si cocinas como caminas, yo me como hasta la raspa.
Si como camina lo bate, yo quiero chocolate.
You guys…always thinking with your stomachs.
Readers Mariel Acosta and Ana Galan both gave us this video, because “great minds” or whatever.
Tanta dulzura y yo diabético.
I don’t know whether this is more funny or just sad because of diabetes rates among Latinos. Either way, Jorge, here’s a picture of Wilford Brimley in a Liberty Medical commercial for your troubles.
Tu con tantas curvas y yo sin frenos, que putazo nos metemos.
Katro is Remezcla’s head designer. The bit about curves and no brakes is classic, but hot damn I like the addition.
Nunca digas nunca, tampoco digas siempre, pero dime que me quieres como nunca y para siempre.
¿De qué juguetería te escapaste?, ¡muñeco!
Qué Dios te guarde y me dé la llave!
Si tu cuerpo fuera carcel y tus brazos cadenas, que bonito lugar para cumplir condena.
El amor es como una abeja, primero te pica y luego te deja.
The above list comes from a new member of the Remezcla family, Martin Giraldo, who I’m going to assume does extremely well with the ladies.
Be sure to leave any more you can think of in the comments, and que tu Valentine’s Day sea bien pervy!