Alexandre Pato’s Move to Chelsea Is Imminent

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Looks like Brazilian striker Alexandre Pato is heading to London. Sources are reporting that the Corinthians crack is set to complete a loan deal with Chelsea (you know, the team that El Chapo wanted to buy?). I guess any and all hopes of signing #Chichadios went out the window when Christmas came early and José Mourinho was sacked.

Just what we need, another Chelsea dude with a knack for scoring at the Emirates…

At 26 years old, Pato has been through it all. He joined Corinthians in 2013 from AC Milan, spent two years on loan at São Paulo, got injured *a lot* and scored his fair share of goals to boot. He’s even featured 27 times for the Brazilian national team.

For Guus Hiddink, Pato provides an all too necessary option for go-to second-choice striker behind Diego Costa and ahead of Loic Remy and Radamel Falcao (Falcao’s time at Chelsea can accurately be described as a disastrous, injury-prone failure up to this point).

Chelsea fans and foes, check the scouting report for yourselves. Here’s to watching the Brazilian boy shine against everybody but you and your squad. ?